Establishing an intention

A useful exercise.

Something I would consider worth doing is establishing an intention behind your actions. There are many things that we do in our day to day life without putting much thought into it and so when others perceive your actions in a certain way, you may find yourself wanting to change your intention in order to receive the desired response.

I think establishing intention is helpful because it’s a guide to remind you why you started in the first place.

I think for a lot of people, it’s easy to get caught up in focusing on how you are perceived. By establishing an intention, what you’re actually doing is giving yourself a baseline to come back to, or a north star to guide you, something that comes from yourself instead of other people.

The last thing you want to end up doing is putting too much emphasis on what other people think and then being swayed every which way because you’re so focused on trying to please people.

I think that there are two things that often happen, the first is that you are perceived in a way that is different to what you intended. The second is thing is that you find yourself changing to fit a particular perception that is does not align with your original intentions.

This is because when we don’t hold a clear vision for what we want we’re more likely to give into the short-term attention gained from aligning with a trend or popular perception rather than building a solid foundation.

Sometimes we need a reminder to focus more on ourselves instead of the world around us.

The outsiders mentality

People that think they’re outsiders act like outsiders.

The idea of being an outsider is often a self-fulfilling prophecy, something that is brought into existence rather than being totally true in the first place.

When the thought comes into your mind, as soon as you hold onto it and allow it to become a part of how you identify yourself you’ll subconsciously work to make it true.

Being an outsider is associated with being fringe, being different but sometimes even unique or original.

It can have both positive and negative connotations.

As soon as you start to think you’re different and ‘not like them’. You’ll start to separate yourself, exclude yourself even. Often that is what makes a person become an outsider.

The reality is, groups of people come together that are very different all the time.

From the outside

Appearances are everything or at least that’s how it often appears.

The woman with a good education, working a great job at a high profile company.

The guy that everyone goes to for advice because he’s warm, kind and always says what you need to hear (not just what you want to hear).

From the outside they seem to have it together. She lives a stable life and is on the road to a successful career with lots of opportunities. She’s earning enough money to buy a property and take regular holidays. She works hard in a field that is highly regarded.

He always makes time for people and he never really seems to go through anything major. He’s an important part of so many peoples. He’s loved, trustworthy and generous.

But she’s unfulfilled, her life looks great from the outside but isn’t happy with how her life has turned out.

But he’s overwhelmed being who he is to so many people and now he’s scared to make time for himself because he doesn’t want to let anyone down.

From the outside they appear to be living great lives but from the inside they both have their own struggles.

Just a reminder that looks can be deceiving and that you never really know what someone else is going through, no matter how great their life appears to be.