The big idea

I often like to remind myself of Zig Ziglars popular quote ‘Anything worth doing is worth doing poorly until you can learn to do it well.

So, how do you execute a big idea when you’re just starting out. Or do you just put it on hold until you have more experience.

I used to think that it was best to wait because I didn’t want to look back on a good idea and see how much better it could have been.

But in doing that, I wasn’t allowing myself the room for trial and error, room to improve.

There’s nothing wrong in doing something poorly , it’s part of the process. Not everything you do will be perfect and treating things as so will only limit your potential.

So, if you have a big idea that you’re holding back on, now might be the perfect time to do something with it.

The right time to quit

Perhaps there is no right time.

It’s easy to quit in the early stages but gets harder over time. After 3 years once you’ve  invested time effort and energy quitting, even if it’s for the best feels like giving up.

And so, it’s hard to know the right time to quit. If you’ve been working on something for a while and that could just be a few months  (it depends on how much you’re putting into it), if you’re thinking of quitting don’t make what you’ve put into it so far be the only reason to keep going.

But some questions to ask and things to consider are:

Do you still believe in what you’re doing?
If you knew what you now know, would you still start today?
Are you doing this for yourself or because you feel you have something to prove?
Do you enjoy doing the work?
Will the end result bring you joy?

Maybe you can do something about it

For some people the idea that they can solve the problems and inconveniences in their life is not something they’ve considered.

When an inconvenience arises and you take the ‘do nothing approach’, it might not go away. It might remain or just grow and grow to the point where it’s unbearable.

Imagine you get a light pain in your back and it’s uncomfortable at the time but you just shrug it off assuming yeah, it’ll just go away. Maybe you’re right but your back is also quite important so it’s worth taking the ‘do it now approach’ and getting checked out.

In a few months that small pain could turn into something much worse.

The point I’m making can be applied to so many aspects of life.

Maybe at times we choose to do nothing because we don’t think it’s a big deal  or we feel getting help would be an inconvenience for other people. Most significantly we assume that these little problems won’t be the cause of avoidable issues in the future.

The next time a problem or inconvenience comes up, don’t just ignore it, nip it in the bud as soon as you can, you don’t have to carry every little problem with you through life.

You can make things easier, if you want to.

The push-back

Because every action has an equal and opposite reaction.

I’ve been using the term push-back for a while. I use it to refer to how we react to negative/un-ideal circumstances.

But not any reaction just the specific ones often done when our emotions are heightened and we’re angry or frustrated.

Imagine you’re a kid and you’re parents refuse to give you the freedom you desire. It’s quite likely that you’ll be annoyed and find some way (even if it’s small) to rebel.
Maybe that’s always coming home late or creating a secret life for yourself like haha I’ll show you.

Or as an adult maybe you have lots of goals and plans and someone tells you to slow down or that you’re doing too much.  If that’s not what you’re happy to hear you might end up just doubling down on all your stuff and possibly burning out. That’s a form of pushing back.

However, there are other ways that you can choose to handle or manage situations. For example, you’re trying to get your book published you get 101 rejections so you decide to self publish.

It’s a reaction to an un-ideal situation but it isn’t out of anger or frustration. A push-back could have been getting rid of your book or replying to the rejections in anger and frustration. But you have to think about what’s actually helpful.

It might feel good to push-back but it might be more helpful to think about what the kindest and most helpful thing you can do for yourself to overcome the situation is.

Talk but don’t dwell

Often when we talk about difficult things we get so caught up in the story that we end up dwelling on it.

Sometimes to the point where we end up reliving it and our bodies remember exactly how it felt.

It could be a time you felt rejected, overwhelmed or ignored.

It’s not difficult to understand that those are things you might want to speak about. But it is important that you’re not just talking about it for the sake of it.

Talking is an amazing tool that you can use to help get past or overcome challenges but also just to get things off your chest.

However, if every few days you’re having conversations telling the same story about a situation that didn’t feel good, that’s just dwelling and it’s probably not going to benefit you in any way either.

It’s like that popular quote says:

Where attention goes energy flows

If you catch yourself telling the same stories over and over stop and ask, why?

It could be because you’re not over it and you still have strong emotions attached to whatever happened. If it’s something you want to get past, start with learning how to let go.

 

The feeling is not the problem

I think this is what they call a break through.

Perhaps we should look at situations from a neutral perspective.

The feeling you have towards any situation is not the problem and that is the mistake that is so often made.

We get so carries away by how dreadful it feels and sometimes that can spur us on but other times its just a hindrance. How are you supposed to go out into the world and thrive when you’re caught up in emotions.

Take unemployment for example. If you’re focused on how blah it feels to not have a job then every rejection email will be more likely to feel like a knock physically and mentally. Then before you know it you’ll be declaring that the job market is impossible and that you’re without a hope in the world.

The feeling is not the problem.

If you’re instead focused on the act of applying for jobs and improving your CV you’ll undoubtedly have a very different experience.

And the thing with a job is if there’s only vacancy and 50 people apply even if they’re all perfect applicants 49 people will still ‘lose’.

But that doesn’t make them losers it just means they have to keep playing that game.

The deep end: It’s not that deep

On how life imitates being in water when you can’t swim.

Sometimes in all the flurry and commotion of being thrown into the deep end, you forget to check how deep it actually is.

If you stop panicking and give yourself a moment to stop, to take a deep breath and to place your feel firmly on the ground you might realise that the deep end is not that deep after all.

But sometimes it is ‘that deep’ which is why learning to swim is so important and if you haven’t learnt how to swim yet, the best thing you can do for now is to stay afloat.