Worth the hassle

Before deciding whether or not to do something it’s worth asking yourself if it is worth the hassle.

Sometimes, we jump in head first because we think we should do something or we feel like we’re supposed to do it.

Instead, I think it’s much more helpful to assess if it’s something that even needs to be done. The last thing you want is to out of your way or go above and beyond for something that you don’t consider worth it or something you will regret agreeing to.

An example could be agreeing to help someone when you’re already busy. Something like that is rarely worth the hassle and being considered helpful for taking on too much and exhausting yourself probably won’t make it any more worth it.

Don’t believe you’re missing out

You’ve probably had the experience of feeling totally fine but as soon as you see or hear about what other people are doing (or have done) suddenly you feel a sense of lack.

It’s like if you spend your Friday night at home watching a movie and painting your nails but the next week everyone is talking about this amazing party they went to saying things like ‘it was so good’ or ‘you should have been there’ you might end up believing it.

That’s an example of the mind almost playing tricks because at the same time we’ve all been somewhere and known that we’d have been just as content (and in some cases happier) staying at home.

I guess sometimes it feels good to do what everyone else is doing, it brings of sense of belonging and as humans that is something we all seek.

But it’s so important to consider how you enjoy spending your time.

If planting flowers, cooking and writing poetry is time well spent for you, it shouldn’t matter what other people are doing.

The last thing you want is to find yourself belonging in a space where you aren’t even being yourself or doing things enjoy simply to avoid ‘missing out‘.

Breaking up the day

If you”re working on a laptop from 9-5 and spend your evenings scrolling social media, watching youtube and binging the latest fantasy thriller series, you’ll have spent most of your day staring at a screen.

You aren’t going out to restaurants, going for drinks, visiting museums, catching up with friends in a local cafe or going dancing like you used.

When you’re spending your days staring at a screen, it’s no wonder the days will start to blur into one.

Obviously you can’t eliminate the 8 working hours from your day but being at home means you have some level of flexibility when it comes to how you choose to structure your day.

What are you doing in-between work, emails, YouTube, Instagram, Twitter, Whatsapp, Facebook, Netflix etc?

What are you doing to break up your day?

Now might be the perfect time to find some offline hobbies that you can easily do from home, things that don’t require a screen.

It could be hand embroidery, baking, gardening, reading, drawing, making body butter, mixing essential oils, writing in a notebook or sewing on a machine.

It’s not about ditching your screens but instead acknowledging that you might get more fulfillment from an hour of baking in the afternoon instead of an extra hour on social media.

The right thing to do

Sometimes right and wrong is hazy.

Other times right and wrong is black and white.

The interesting part is when 2 groups come together with 2 different perspectives.

In the current state of the world, many would argue that the right thing to do is stay home as much as possible and practice social distancing. And these same people see it pretty black and white.

On the other hand there is a group of people who are out regularly and socialising in groups. They know they aren’t supposed to, they know the impacts of doing so and the benefits of abiding by the rules yet they still reject them.

For these people right and wrong is hazy.

Or maybe they just like the idea of being rebellious.

What we can learn from working from home

Turns out that the 9-5 isn’t as necessary as it once was.

With everything going on in the world meetings are becoming emails or being done by video, travel has come to a halt and working from home may become the non-optional office alternative.

Despite the unfortunate situation that has caused things to change, I can’t help but notice that there is something to learn.

As someone that works in an office less than 50% of what I do requires me to be in the building or to interact with my co-workers.

But I can imagine a time when people used typewriters or even computers that you couldn’t physically take home. Back then, being in your office was necessary to undertake your work.

These days all you need is a laptop and you can use that anywhere.

I’m not championing no longer having an office at all. However, I do think it is worth exploring how often you actually need to be in the company office and the purpose that it serves.

For many it’s the social aspect of going to the kitchen for tea and a catch up with a work pal, it’s meeting people when you’re new to the city, it’s having a space to work for those with limited room at home or those wanting to maintain separation between work and life.

Having an office to go to isn’t necessary for 8 hours a day, 5 days a week but it does come with benefits.

It introduces us to new people, gives us a routine and gives us the opportunity to be part of a culture.

Knowing when to leave (a message for the festive season and beyond)

Merry Christmas.

The festive season is an interesting time of year. You might have a wonderful time with loved ones having dinners, going to parties, going for drinks and catching up with those that are town to spend Christmas with their families.

But you might also find yourself in places you don’t want to be or don’t want to be in for a long time but it’s okay.

I’m currently learning the lesson that if you find yourself somewhere that you don’t want to be, leave (and that applies to life in general, not just for the festive season).

You don’t have to keep up appearances for the sake of trying to appease or to please. And sure it might feel uncomfortable leaving early or turning down an invite but it’s useful to get into the habit of being able to do what feels right for you.

I recently found myself in a place that I didn’t want to be, I suppose in hindsight you could call it an intuitive feeling, I knew that I needed to leave.

I was in a particular place and felt a little off, I waited a few moments to discern whether I needed to leave or if I just felt anxious. But I realised it wasn’t anxiety because I felt calm, so I decided to leave.

As soon as I left, I realised that I shouldn’t have been there in the first place but I also held compassion for myself (something else I’m learning to do).

A few years ago even if I wanted to leave my anxiety would have stopped me. I’d have forced myself to feel uncomfortable because back then I felt like I had to find a way to feel good in those situations. It never occurred to me that maybe there were some places that I just didn’t need to be.

So the message for today is don’t get so caught up in the festive season and the idea of having fun to the point where you forget to do what’s best for you.