If you want to reach me you can call, text, WhatsApp, dm on Twitter or Instagram and even catch me on FB messenger.
We’re more connected than ever with regard to the countless channels that are available. So how ironic is it that it seems like as a society we’re more alone than ever.
I think it’s something to do with technology being used to replace actually having face to face conversations. As much as technology can imitate and replicate person to person interaction as Marvin Gaye and Tammi Terrell once sang ‘ain’t nothing like the real thing baby’.
You can go on Twitter and see people interacting all day long but then they’ll tweet about feeling lonely.
I think online connections are great as a supplement but not a replacement. Perhaps we actually need the eye contact, the sound of someone’s voice, the pauses between speech and the sight of another living being.
You can meet or come across someone and immediately assume this persons whole life.
Then from the minute they open they’re mouth you’re deciding whether or not what they say aligns with or contradicts your initial assumptions but you’re still not giving the person a chance.
But then life sets things up in a way that forces you to wipe your slate of assumptions clean and actually get to know this person for who they are instead of you just making things up.
And so you realise that this person is kind and interesting along with some other great adjectives.
But even more importantly you realise that you were too quick to judge and that the more useful thing to do would be to actually get to know the person face to face rather than make assumptions from afar.
Appearances are everything or at least that’s how it often appears.
The woman with a good education, working a great job at a high profile company.
The guy that everyone goes to for advice because he’s warm, kind and always says what you need to hear (not just what you want to hear).
From the outside they seem to have it together. She lives a stable life and is on the road to a successful career with lots of opportunities. She’s earning enough money to buy a property and take regular holidays. She works hard in a field that is highly regarded.
He always makes time for people and he never really seems to go through anything major. He’s an important part of so many peoples. He’s loved, trustworthy and generous.
But she’s unfulfilled, her life looks great from the outside but isn’t happy with how her life has turned out.
But he’s overwhelmed being who he is to so many people and now he’s scared to make time for himself because he doesn’t want to let anyone down.
From the outside they appear to be living great lives but from the inside they both have their own struggles.
Just a reminder that looks can be deceiving and that you never really know what someone else is going through, no matter how great their life appears to be.
What great use it is to remember that not everyone is like you. We often approach situations with this underlying thought that we’re right and they’re wrong or tell ourselves that we have to try and convince the other person that we’re right at any cost.
We‘re so convinced it’s what we have to do that we’re even sometimes willing to raise our voices, shout and argue.
But what if we instead acknowledged that it’s okay to think differently and that we are both valid in the perspectives that we hold. What if you accept that this person does not come under ‘people like us’ but instead that there are people like you and people like me.
Someone might even seem just like you on paper but in reality hold totally different views to you as a resolute of the paths that they’ve taken. We shouldn’t berate them for not thinking like us.
Maybe the next time you’re about to try and change someone’s mind remember there are people like you and people like me.
We don’t share the same point of view and that’s okay.