Talking about how unhappy you are with where you’re at is easy to do. Talking about the changes you want to happen in your life is also pretty easy.
But when it comes to actually turning those thoughts into plans, things tend to get a little more challenging.
First of all, there is the familiarity factor. There is comfort in familiarity. Just the fact that your current circumstance is what you’re used to will make it difficult for you to move on from it to something new.
Then, there is the commitment to the change you want.
Lastly, there is the risk ‘what if it doesn’t work?’
All of that is enough to convince many people to stay exactly where they are. Or they tell themselves they’ll make the changes slowly over time. But often those efforts are half-hearted.
What you might need to do is take a leap a faith. Launch yourself into the unknown, fully committed and knowing that you can handle whatever challenges come your way.
Sometimes that’s the only way to make changes in your life.
Often when a person finds themselves craving something new, it’s because they’re bored with where they’re at.
As much as familiarity can be comforting and pleasant, for many people they find themselves at a point where they want more.
You find yourself wanting something different, not because what you’re used to isn’t working but because you want to remember the feeling of newness.
It’s like taking a different route home every once in a while. You do it to switch things up not because you never want to take your usual route again.
This idea can apply to so many things and one of them is the work you do. When you’re doing the same thing over and over you’ll get sick of it after a while because you’re no longer doing it consciously, you’re not thinking or stretching your mind and you want to be challenged.
So, you put yourself forward for a new type of work. It’s new and unfamiliar and you enjoy it simply because it’s not what you’re used to.
The beauty of this kind of situation is after you’re tried something new, you can go back to what you were doing before often with new found appreciation.
A big part of creativity is being vulnerable.
When the work you’re producing is not at the level you’re content with it may be because of one of 2 reasons.
The first is that you’re working in a medium that you’re so used to that you need to dig deeper in order to produce something with an element of vulnerability.
The second is that you’re working in a new, less familiar medium and you haven’t reached that level of comfort where you’re able to be vulnerable with what you create.
As someone who writes a daily blog, has journalled for over a decade, has had various lifestyle blogs over the past 8 years and also writes poetry, I’m quite familiar with expressing vulnerability through my words.
However, I’ve recently been working on taking and styling photos which is something new for me.
I’m still finding my way with taking photots which is why it often feels difficult. But instead of pushing myself to create something interesting, I find myself holding back.
It’s easier just to do something simple instead of putting myself into my work. That takes vulnerability.
There are levels to creativity.
I beleive that I’m able to convey vulnerability through my writing. But as I work with other mediums I find that I’m much less free-flowing. My work is rigid and sometimes uninteresting.
It’s not neccisarily bad but in the creative process I don’t feel like I’m experimenting or pushing the boundary
The idea of exploring is one I don’t think is valued enough. I don’t mean travelling and exploring new countries or cities, I mean exploring self.
Being able to know your own limits whilst also being able to put yourself out there and experience new things.
It’s so easy to stay within the remit of what you know because there’s comfort in familiarity. However, it’s also worth considering when you don’t venture outside of that you lose the chance to learn about yourself about and understand yourself.
When you give yourself the opportunity to explore life a little more, you might find that you don’t actually believe the things you thought were true.
It’s more than just comfort and familiarity but it’s both of those things too.
When you move on from something and you haven’t reached the place you moved on to, it’s totally normal to look back at what you left or let go of.
And when you’re in a place of limbo, perhaps feeling a little dissatisfied with where you’re at, you might find yourself looking back from a place of lack.
Then suddenly that thing you chose to leave looks golden and bright. You find yourself wondering why you even moved on in the first place.
But deep down you don’t really want that thing, you just crave certainty. It’s much easier to take a step back to the familiarity of what you know than it is to keep going and venture on into the unknown.
Not all games are worth playing, not unless you have to.
If you could choose certainty over uncertainty, would you?
Would you still choose certainty if it required courage and perhaps a little discomfort (which is totally normal when something is new).
If the answer is no then that means that your fear overrides the bit of you that wants to be at peace. That you’ll accept long-term discomfort because it’s comfortable and familiar over short term momentary discomfort that will lead to peace.
It might be hard to admit to you yourself and even harder to say out loud but what if it’s true.
What if you’re subconsciously (or consciously now that you’re aware) holding yourself back because you’ve become comfortable with discomfort.
I’ve always said that there’s comfort in familiarity, it’s a better the devil you know kind of situation.
So, if you find yourself in the waiting game and it’s uncomfortable, don’t keep playing.
Do something different, it might feel scary but it might be worth it.
We all have them.
Cosy socks, worn out joggers and a stripy fleece (or maybe that’s just me).
I find that most people go back to old favourites be it an outfit combination, shoes, a book, movie, tv show, hairstyle, nail colour, a person or a place.
We do it because as people we are drawn to what we know. And perhaps we also have that bit ingrained in our brains that seeks safety. And what is safer than something you know, definitely not something you don’t know.
I was watching what is probably my favourite Australian TV recently ‘The secret life of us’. I could have watched something new, something I’d never seen before but instead I returned to an old favourite.
Granted there is no issue of safety here but I think it sort of proves that even though we don’t live the same way we used to, that bit of our brain that links safety/comfort with familiarity is still very much active.