In situations that don’t turn out how we’d have liked we often tell ourselves that if the roles were reversed we’d have handled things better.
When we’re observing or experiencing a persons response or reaction to something, we’re experiencing it second hand from a different perspective.
NLP (Neuro Linguistic Programming) has a presupposition that says people do the best they can based on the the information they have and their past experiences.
It’s quite easy to become critical of how someone handles something when you feel that making a different choice would improve the outcome.
But what really happens when the roles are reversed.
Over the past 6 or so months I’ve experienced situations where I was now person A whose response to situations would have an impact on the other person, B.
Something I’ve learnt is that sometimes when you’re person A doing what feels ‘right’, honest or true to yourself is often not going to be aligned with the outcome person B would want. I’m learning that it’s important to be honest more than trying to be a good person or doing things based on putting yourself in control of how someone else will feel.
Even if you don’t get the chance to experience the flip-side of a situation that didn’t turn out how you wanted, looking at a situation from the other persons perspective is truly a useful exercise.