Something many forget to consider is that two things can be equally true without one thing being more right or better than the other.
For example, sweets can taste really good whilst also being bad for you.
One person can find something helpful whilst another finds it useless.
You could consider a song to be really good whilst I consider it to be terrible.
There is no rule that statements of truth can’t contradict. Yet we often go out into the world trying to prove that our personal truth is the ultimate truth.
Before deciding whether or not to do something it’s worth asking yourself if it is worth the hassle.
Sometimes, we jump in head first because we think we should do something or we feel like we’re supposed to do it.
Instead, I think it’s much more helpful to assess if it’s something that even needs to be done. The last thing you want is to out of your way or go above and beyond for something that you don’t consider worth it or something you will regret agreeing to.
An example could be agreeing to help someone when you’re already busy. Something like that is rarely worth the hassle and being considered helpful for taking on too much and exhausting yourself probably won’t make it any more worth it.
When you’re vocal about your beliefs and the things you want to do in your life, it can be difficult when you change your mind.
If you openly displayed yourself to the world in a particular way, major change (especially if it contradicts with your existing aims) will come with judgement.
It will come from strangers and people around you but it will also come from yourself. You judge yourself because you have difficulty comprehending and accepting that a person can hold a set of beliefs and then months or years later decide to reject them in favour of something else.
That internal judgement matters more than the judgement we receive from others because if you can’t understand yourself and the choices you’re making, what does that say about who you are?
When you hold yourself to certain expectations it’s likely you’ll end up disappointed if you can’t meet them.
That tends to happen when you put too much pressure on yourself.
Furthermore, how you feel toward yourself will override how anyone else may feel about you falling short.
You could be told that ‘it’s alright, you did your best’, or even ‘it was good, you have nothing to worry about’. But the thing is when you hold yourself to a standard of ‘nothing less than perfection’ it becomes difficult to be comforted by the reassurance of other.
It’s hard disappointing yourself, feeling let down and having no one else to blame. But it gives you a great opportunity to think about what can do better next time.
Some people will never truly hear you when you speak no matter how hard you try.
In those circumstances the solution is never to try harder.
You might think that the harder you try they’ll eventually come around and hear you out. But the thing is some people aren’t interested in being wrong.
Some people aren’t interested in hearing a perspective that contradicts their own.
And even if they realise that they were wrong and the information you shared had changed their mind, they’re more likely to dismiss that.
When a person is more interested in being right than being open to new information, it might be a waste of time trying to get them to listen.
Right now there are a lot of discussions about what is right and wrong.
More often than not we consider it to be black and white. Of course in some cases it is that clear but there are also many cases where the waters are murky.
Robin Hood was known for stealing from the rich to give to the poor. stealing is considered wrong in society yet Robin Hood was never promoted as the bad guy becuase he had good intentions and was helping people.
I think a key part of figuring out right and wrong is looking at the intention behind the action. It also helps to put yourself in the other persons shoes.
Just because you don’t agree with a persons actions, doesn’t mean you have to bring out the pitchforks.
Looking back on the past couple of months, what have been your highlights?
What has brought you joy?
How have you been spending your time?
For some there’s a chance that they have been blossoming into a more truer version of themselves. Becoming someone who is considerate about how they spend their time.
It’s not that you didn’t give it much thought before, it’s that it’s suddenly become much easier to be choosy.
You’re no longer making the best of small fragments of free time, you’re making the best of your time overall.
As a result (in spite of everything going on in the world), you might feel the happiest you’ve felt in a while.
That thing that you’re not interested in, that you don’t think is for you, it might be one day.
It takes time for the mind to open up to things, especially when they’re different or new.
This could apply to the music you listen to, shows you watch or even the food that you eat.
One day you’re telling everyone that you don’t do comedy, you don’t find it funny and you much prefer a drama.
Then years later you’re sat at home watching the office (US), snorting with laughter thankful that you changed your mind about the kind of shows you watch.
The thing with your taste changing over time is that it’s part of your development. You don’t need to force yourself to be a certain way right now just because it’s something on the path you’re heading down.
Be patient, remain open and allow the changes to happen naturally.
Right now is a difficult time for a lot of people.
One of the easiest things you can do is read every article, keep up with live news updates online or on TV, scroll social media and panic.
But the chances are those things aren’t actually helping. Knowing the ever’changing stats of cases in countries across the globe is probably not going to bring you comfort or put your mind at ease.
Most people use social media in excess on a normal day but it’s likely that things have been ramped up even further recently.
Seeing people tell you what they think you should think or how they think you should feel might only add to your frustrations, not soothe them.
And so right now it’s worth being a little more intentional about what you’re consuming.
You don’t need to keep up with everything.
It’s easy to fall into thinking that you only have 2 options.
Do nothing or do what everyone else is doing.
Sometimes that works out okay but other times you need a third option.
That third option is to carve you’re own path and do what feels best for you.
And sure that might draw attention to you or people will have something to say about you straying from the norm but it’s better than the alternative.
I’ve learnt that it’s important to be able to stand in your truth without considering other peoples opinions and thoughts before you’re own.
It could be pursuing a career that others see as risky, taking a solo trip or even speaking up about issues that are important to you.
It doesn’t matter what it is but it does matter that you do what’s right for you.