Pivotal moments

How one small act can change it all

One of my oldest beliefs is that pivotal moments exist. We don’t always recognise them in the moment but on reflection we can see that the small thing that we said or did changed the trajectory or has greatly impacted who we are today.

I experienced a pivotal moment over a year ago. I committed to an act of bravery in spite of fear and panic. Unlike before even, prior to taking any action I knew that I was on course to quite literally transform my life, I could just feel it.

It was that feeling that enabled me to go forth despite the survival mode bit of my brain presenting a strong case against doing what I wanted to do.

Why you shouldn’t focus on what you don’t want

In a book a read a while back it explained why we should focus on what we do want instead of what we don’t want.

It gave the example of someone telling you not to think of a purple elephant and how despite being told not to that is exactly where the mind wanders. That simple example is the same for our wants and goals. It’s the reason why the focus should be on the things that we actually wan’t.

When you spend time focusing on what you don’t wan’t your mind will give energy to those things. Your mind will visualise and think about these things which will only amplify them in your physical reality.

 

Being professional and moving the benchmark

When you’re a kid you think that 21 is grown up. You think that by that age you’ll have everything figured out, that you’ll have met your life partner and that you’ll suddenly be this proper adult with a career…

But then you get to that age and you don’t quite feel how you thought you would.

Is this what its like to be an adult?

That’s the kind of question you ponder regularly. You might even have a professional job in a fancy office but you still feel like a kid in a classroom. But you have colleagues, deadlines, meetings, projects, clients and a work phone with a company branded case. You have all that yet you still feel like you’re playing dress-up and pretending to be professional.

Perhaps some would refer to this as imposter syndrome but you can call it whatever you want really. Often the only way to cure this feeling/mindset is to tell yourself that it will go once you achieve a particular goal. Once you gain accreditation in your field or lead a project.

But moving the benchmark probably won’t work because it’s a mind thing not a physical thing. It’s about how you feel about yourself and your ability.

My advice would be (to quote Sinek) start with why. Why do you feel that way about yourself? Once you understand that, it’s just a case of implementing a new mindset.

 

Unexpected ideal circumstances

It’s much easier to tell yourself a story about the worst case scenario.

‘Of course this won’t work out…’

But even in those cases we often have this picture in our mind of how we want things to really turn out. We’re just too scared to believe in the possibility of something good happening for us.

As life would have it, sometimes good things do happen. It’s not as rare as our minds will have us believe.