Sonder, struggles and stuff

We’re all just doing our best which is something that we often forget and it might be the reason why we’re often so quick to judge others.

We so easily get caught up in our own world, our own challenges, experiences and struggles that we don’t consider everyone else is going through things too.

You might be struggling with anxiety but someone else may have financial issues and be struggling to pay their bills. People don’t often share what they’re going through (especially not with strangers) so all we know is our own personal stuff that we’re carrying around with us.

But, I think it would be naive to say let’s all share our struggles and challenges.

However, when you’re going through things I think it’s important to remember that everyone else goes through things too.

Not as a way to invalidate your own experiences but to help you realise that it’s totally normal to have challenges and difficult experiences in life.

And once you truly realise that for yourself, extend that to everyone you meet.

Do I have to struggle in order to succeed?

I’m starting to wonder whether struggle has to be apart of every ‘success story’.

There’s this thing about the struggle, going as close to the brink as possible but managing to find a way to make it. That story is celebrated it’s the ‘rags to riches’ story and one of the most well known examples is Cinderella.

Her mother died, her father married a woman with 2 daughters who all treated her poorly and then her father died but in the end she married a Prince!

But I sometimes wonder if life really has to be that way. Constantly hearing of peoples struggle on the road to success ingrains that narrative in our minds and makes us think that the struggles we face will lead us to greatness.

Like my life is super crappy now but in 10 years time whilst I’m counting my big bucks I’ll tell people about how I slept on my friends couch, had to sell my car and most of my possessions just to get by but look at me now.

I currently work an office based 9-5 and I’d like to think I can do more beyond that in my lifetime. But I don’t want a Cinderella type struggle and I don’t want my hard times to be the justification for any good stuff that comes my way.

What I’m realising though is that there’s a big difference between working hard and going through hard times.

So no, I don’t think the struggle is necessary in order to succeed but I can’t deny it adds some pizzazz to the how I got to where I am today story.