When something is on your mind and you choose not to say it, the result is often unideal.
Let’s think of the thing you choose to hold in as a tennis ball. If you say it, you can drop the ball but if you don’t say it, you have to carry the ball around with you.
At first, it doesn’t really bother you because a tennis ball isn’t particularly big and you can carry it in one hand with no issue.
But after a few hours, days or weeks it starts to become an inconvenience.
We sometimes kid ourselves that things don’t bother us but then a few weeks later it’s still on our mind, the tennis ball is still in your hand.
And like with the tennis ball concept, we end up telling ourselves that it doesn’t matter because it’s small or easy to carry. But if you apply this mentality, you’ll find yourself carrying several tennis balls.
The point is that you don’t have to.
When you allow yourself to hold on to lots of little things, they eventually become a great burden instead of a potentially short conversation that you can move on from.
It’s all in how it feels.
When you find yourself with a choice to make between A and B, the main challenge will be wanting to make the right decision.
You don’t want to pick an option that you might later regret. But the truth is most of the time, you never really know how you’ll feel a month or a year down the line.
And as much as you can go back and forth, at the end of the day you have to choose.
I find that that it helps to put as little pressure on the decision as possible. Sometimes even make a game of it, put your options into an online hat that will pick for you or pick flower petals.
Whatever you end up choosing if you feel calm and at peace granted part of that will come from no longer having the burden of deciding on your shoulders but the feeling of peace will also be from having made the right choice for you.
It’s not always easy to show people that you’ve changed.
Especially when on the outside you look exactly the same. For example, how do you show someone that you’ve developed new neurological pathways?
For the most part when you change, you do it for you. Although on the other side of it you might feel like you have something to prove. Or maybe you’re proud of how far you’ve come and so you want to share it.
But in truth when you’ve really changed you won’t need to parade it around. It’ll be clear to see in the way you talk and the things you do.
And sure they’ll be people who refuse to see it because they liked you stagnant and they aren’t ready willing to see that you’ve evolved but that’s not your burden to carry.
When it comes to race related comments, what’s worth commenting on?
Is it worth the energy it takes to call someone out and explain to them why what they said is slightly (or maybe even highly) concerning?
If it goes well it would probably be worth it but if the other person is adamant that there was nothing wrong with what they said, where do you go from there?
Furthermore, it’s almost as if your race becomes a burden when in certain spaces you realise that people might just be tolerating you but after a drink or two they’ll make a race related comment.
And so let’s take it full circle and ask the question of what comments are worth commenting on?
Turns out there is no set answer.
Currently making plans for how I can expand this site in order to make use of quotes and notes that I’ve collected over the years. I’ve read quite a few books from which I’ve made notes and jotted down quotes.
I’m at a point where I have a collection of things that I don’t really know what to do with, so why not share them with you.
I’ve been skeptical of sharing ‘7 quotes on failure by Seth Godin’ because as a daily blogger I know that sometimes that kind of content is lazy. It’s not coming from me and my creative flow which is what I want the focus to be on in this space.
However, if I can find a way to incorporate things I’ve found useful with the hopes that my readers will benefit then I’ll do it.
It may just be more mentions of other people in my posts or links to things I’ve found useful for further reading.
Collecting stuff is great but if you have no plans for what to do with it all, it might just become a burden.