Before you ask the question, you probably have a pretty good idea of what you want the answer to be.
Sometimes it goes as far as you formulating a question in order to hear a specific answer, like prasie or a compliment.
And sometimes it comes from a place of vanity but other times perhaps you need a little reassurance or a confidence boost.
Then there are other situations where we beat around the bush and ask questions that don’t quite get us the information we wanted. We’re indirect instead of direct. We do this from a place of fear.
When you’re scared to ask a question it’s much easier to ask around the question but the issue with this is that you end up unsatisfied.
The answer you get doesn’t satisfy you because you really wanted to ask about something else. You end up still having more to ask.
This is why it’s so important to ask the right questions.
It’s easier said than done.
We grow up having people tell us to be more or less of ourselves.
And for many at a young age you follow the words of those older than you. That’s fine when it comes to things like eating a balanced diet, doing your homework and being kind to people.
But on the flip-side when you’re being told to what career path to pursue or who you should be, I think that’s a problem.
How are you ever going to figure out who you are and be yourself if you’re always listening to other people? Sure this person might mean well and think they’re being helpful but they could also be projecting.
You’ll get told not to pursue something creative because it’s risky, to get a job in a particular sector because it’s more stable, to dress in differently… the list goes on. But often this advice has nothing to do with your happiness or life goals, it’s about conformity, a lack of belief, other peoples discomfort or even control.
And if you listen to all these voices and follow along with what you’re told you slowly start being less and less yourself and therefore less happy.
It’s not much fun living your life as an actor and allowing everyone else to direct.
And so in order to ‘simply’ be yourself you have to let go of all that stuff and be okay with other people being frustrated that you won’t do what they say.
In exchange for that, you get to be you.