You’re either A, B or somewhere in-between.
Person A takes the do it now approach and gets things done as they arise or sets time aside to do it in the future.
Person B takes the do nothing approach, also known as the do it later approach, think of a procrastinator. Person B does nothing when things arise even if they know that they could do it now.
They put things off until they’re short of time and then wonder why their heart is palpitating (I’ve been Person B many times).
But there comes a time when you have to do some self-reflection to understand what is and isn’t working. Ask yourself ‘What can I do to make things in my life run smoother?’
I think reevaluating the approach you take in life is the equivalent of a keystone habit (one habit that has a domino effect where you end up changing a bunch of habits as a result of changing one).
A person that takes the do nothing approach is more likely to be overwhelmed, unorganised, tense, stressed, less productive and be achieving much less than they’re capable of.
If you’re able to identify with Person B, you might feel like it’s too hard to change your ways. But there’s a beautiful thing called neuroplasticity that allows your brain to change.
Once you make a commitment to to your own development, it just takes practice.
Not all games are worth playing, not unless you have to.
If you could choose certainty over uncertainty, would you?
Would you still choose certainty if it required courage and perhaps a little discomfort (which is totally normal when something is new).
If the answer is no then that means that your fear overrides the bit of you that wants to be at peace. That you’ll accept long-term discomfort because it’s comfortable and familiar over short term momentary discomfort that will lead to peace.
It might be hard to admit to you yourself and even harder to say out loud but what if it’s true.
What if you’re subconsciously (or consciously now that you’re aware) holding yourself back because you’ve become comfortable with discomfort.
I’ve always said that there’s comfort in familiarity, it’s a better the devil you know kind of situation.
So, if you find yourself in the waiting game and it’s uncomfortable, don’t keep playing.
Do something different, it might feel scary but it might be worth it.
If you take the time to read (or listen enough you’ll find that science (or philosophy or spirituality or whatever floats your boat) can explain everything.
And once you know there’s a reason behind something, especially if it’s difficult or challenging it might help you overcome it.
It turns out that the secrets of who we are and how we feel aren’t that that rare. You’re not the only one who… [insert thing here].
You might think you are because you’ve never spoken about it, because you don’t know anyone that’s spoken about it or maybe you feel so dreadful about it that you can’t imagine anyone else has to deal with this ‘thing’ and life too.
I’ve had many challenges that felt pretty overwhelming at times and then came Godin, Sinek, Dweck, Eagleman and podcasts.
After a while I began to understand that maybe this stuff wasn’t ‘the end of the world’ but instead part of it and it didn’t have to stay with me forever.
And of course writing has helped immensely because that’s the power of telling stories of life.
Life changing can be as simple as staying in bed for an extra 20 minutes or getting up on the first alarm.
When you think of life changing, what comes to mind?
We often get caught up in thinking for something to be life changing it has to be grand and spectacular. Travelling for 3 months, moving to a new city, quitting your job, winning the lottery etc.
But on the small scale we do life changing things everyday. Something like giving change to to a homeless man. You walk by, stop, find some money, hand it to him and then maybe smile and he’ll respond thanks or god bless (well the ones I see do anyway).
That small interaction could change your life but it could also change his.
Everything that we do has the power to change the trajectory of our lives.
You could attend an event and meet your new best friend, the love of your life (or the next few years), meet someone that offers you a job, learn something new or be inspired to start a new project.
On the other hand, you could stay at home.
Can you remember where you were at in life 3 years ago?
Did you have a job?
Where did you work?
Were you happy?
How were you spending your free time?
Where did you live?
What were you reading?
What were your life goals?
Who were your friends?
Who were you dating?
A lot can change in 1000 and something days and in a ‘Go, go, go!’ society it can be easy to overlook just how far you’ve come.
Maybe you went from working part-time in a cafe, pretty happy with life, reading sci-fi and dating a dreamy guy who took you on picnics and twirled you to beautiful music.
But now you work full-time in HR, you’re not particularly happy, you have live in an expensive apartment in the city and don’t make time for the things you enjoy.
Things could be better, worse or maybe just different.
And if looking back makes you realise you’re not happy with where you’re at, why not do something about it.
Can you guess what book I’ve been reading?
Over a year ago (on my other blog, wordsbygemm) I wrote a post about my job.
Looking back, knowing what I now know I kind of regret my words.
Here’s what I wrote: Maybe, it’s strange that I sort of like being a cog in a machine, doing my bit to support the bigger picture.
I didn’t know it at the time but I’d fallen into a fear based trap. I basically wanted a factory job that presented itself as something else because it was in an office and I was at a computer instead of a machine.
I’d go to work sit at my desk, check emails, read documents, chat with colleagues, write letters and occasionally make phone calls. That was all I did on a loop pretty much in any random order depending on the day.
But I’ve since seen the light, I suppose. Firstly my level of contentment with how I was showing up at work wasn’t what I thought it would be. I found myself wanting to more.
And so thanks to me choosing to read Seth Godins book linchpin, I’m understanding how I can be better at what I do.
I want to show up at work and add value not just follow instructions, anyone can do that.
I recently got some news and my immediate reaction was to conclusions of the worst case scenario.
It’s funny that we do that so often yet we rarely have the full picture or even half the picture.
Why is it that we give in to the inner pessimist and think the worst but never take the path of optimism?
Something that can help change your mindset is consciously thinking about things from a more useful perspective.
The assumptions we make often put us in the role of a victim and so we end up feeling helpless. But the optimistic path puts you in a position of power.
And a person that feels powerful believes in themselves which will totally transform their experience of life.