So, I’ve recently been reflecting on how I can make this site better. The things that came up were adding categories and adding a search bar.
Categories give the reader a good idea of what they can can expect. Catergories also give the blogger structure as if you have to ensure what you write fits within your chosen areas. I think what stopped me creating categories was my worry that the structure may be limiting.
Also, even though there are clear recurring themes in my blog posts they might not be able to be fit into 3-5 catergories and having more than that might look messy.
But despite all that I’m now realising that there are benefits to having structure.
Having a search bar is simple and gives the reader the option to specify what they’re looking for and that could in turn help me to improve my site.
So, expect to see these 2 changes on the blog soon. Use this as a reminder to do a little audit of your own site and figure out if there’s something missing.
When it comes to labels, they can help people feel like they fit in and belong. Giving something a name can help a person feel more accepted and feel like they understand themselves better.
On the other hand labels can also be limiting. As soon as you declare yourself to be X it comes with preconceived notions and expectations. You then end up grouped in with other people that also label themselves X even though you may be nothing like them.
I recently came across a quote by someone I’d never heard of called Adyashanti:
‘All of these are labels. All of them are fine. There is nothing wrong with any one of them, until you actually believe they’re true. As soon as you believe that a label you’ve put on yourself is true, you’ve limited something that is literally limitless, you’ve limited who you are into nothing more than a thought.‘
It reminded me that labels are totally fine, as long as we don’t give them too much significance.
That was the prompt in a self-help book I read around 6 or 7 years ago.
It was followed by questions like:
- How would you behave?
- How would your relationships change?
- What would it allow you to do?
I think it’s a helpful set of words to get you thinking about how you might be limiting yourself.
As human beings we often fall into thinking that we have to wait until we’re confident to live our lives the way we want. But actually it’s the other way round.
You have to start living your life first and then the confidence will follow.
I think what many are craving is a sense of ‘normal’, the way things once were.
If you’re lucky, normal might have been just fine but it’s worth acknowledging that that’s not the case for everyone.
Of course the easy thing to do would be nothing and just let things go back to what they were, after all you don’t have any issues.
I think that’s the mindset that limits us and stops progress.
We’re so afraid that better for them means worse for us that we’re willing to let them suffer.
It might not be so explicit in your mind but if you take some time you might realise that’s the reason behind your mindset.
Many people have an unspoken set of boundaries for what they do and don’t do or a set of rules that govern the choices they make.
And sometimes the boundaries that you give yourself become limitations.
Suddenly you find that you’re not doing the things that you want to do because your boundaries go against it.
However the thing about boundaries, though they have there benefits they can also be a hindrance.
The more you try to force yourself to adhere to them the harder you judge yourself when you stray.
But, it’s perfectly okay to move away from the person that you thought you’d be.