One of things that makes a challenging experience more challenging is feeling alone.
One of the biggest misconceptions is that you are alone in your difficulties because you’re not.
With a planet of over 7 billion people I’d like to think that pretty much all my challenges are shared by at least one other person on this earth.
But it isn’t a misery loves company thing or a let us rejoice in the fact that your life is just as challenging as mine.
It’s more about the fact that if 264276 other people have experienced the same challenges as me (failure for example), then maybe it’s not as big of a deal as I thought.
In the company of one as in you, yourself and um you, there are many valuable lessons to learn.
A significant one being Who am I?
It’s much easier to gain an understanding of yourself when you’re not having to consider others. I think that the aspects of you in solitude should be the aspects of you that show up when you’re in the company of others.
Things like being able to say what you want, contribute opinions, take the lead and just be you.
For example, when you’re doing things alone you have to make decisions, you can’t rely on others to choose for you.
But for some despite how they are when they’re alone, in the company of others they end up being ‘them but less’, perhaps a little passive or even submissive.
You do it because you want to play the peacemaker or not rock the boat, you don’t think you deserve to be heard or perhaps you’re just scared.
Hiding/playing small is difficult to overcome once it’s ingrained in you as a habitual response.
But change is possible, it just takes practice.